The three lessons I learned in the Philippines

Landon asked me to give a talk on Saturday morning and this is the talk that I wrote and gave in 24 hours. :) I thought that you might enjoy it.

Lesson 1: Happiness

“Heavenly Father desires that we find true, lasting happiness. Our happiness is the design of all the blessings He gives us—gospel teachings, commandments, priesthood ordinances, family relationships, prophets, temples, the beauties of creation, and even the opportunity to experience adversity. His plan for our salvation is often called "the great plan of happiness" (Alma 42:8). He sent His Beloved Son to carry out the Atonement so we can be happy in this life and receive a fullness of joy in the eternities.

Testifying of God's "eternal purposes," the prophet Lehi taught, "Men are, that they might have joy" (2 Nephi 2:15, 25). Many people try to find happiness and fulfillment in activities that are contrary to the Lord's commandments. Ignoring God's plan for them, they reject the only source of real happiness. They give in to the devil, who "seeketh that all men might be miserable like unto himself" (2 Nephi 2:27). Eventually they learn the truth of Alma's warning to his son Corianton: "Wickedness never was happiness" (Alma 41:10).

Others seek only to have fun in life. With this as their main goal, they allow temporary pleasure to distract them from lasting happiness. They rob themselves of the enduring joys of spiritual growth, service, and hard work.” – Gospel Topics, www.lds.org

Before I left for the Philippines, I thought that I was mostly happy. I knew I was blessed with a wonderful family and that the Lord looked out for me. But I spent a large part of everyday worried about money, what I didn’t have, etc. Then I stepped off the plane into a world I had never seen before, a world where according to North America’s standard of living, happiness could not exist. My first impression, through my very tired eyes, was WOW! The rules of the road I was used to were gone. I noticed squatter’s homes. I had seen them in Landon’s pictures but this was different. Shops on the sides of the roads that looked like nothing I had ever seen. But it was here amongst, what North America would call, impoverished people that I learned a valuable lesson about happiness. If I was to name the first trait I noticed about Filipinos was happiness. They were always smiling and calling out to us. The look of joy on their faces as Landon conversed with them in their native tongue always brought tears to my eyes. As I met our friends in Sumag the first time I couldn’t believe how happy they were. It was contagious. As we went out the next afternoon to have lunch in their homes was when I became truly humbled. As Rova tracked us down and brought us to her home, I started to realize all that I had. Rova, her three children, her sister, sister’s daughter, and two parents live in a bamboo hut on stilts. They run a small chungee and welcome all into their home. As her father, who is inactive, sat and read the Liahona and her mother busied herself in finding food for us, I was overcome by the spirit. They offered us all they had. I stopped noticing my surroundings. Or at least what I would have considered the lack of possessions. No running water, no indoor plumbing, chickens, turkeys, pigs running at our feet. All I could feel was love and happiness. They were happy with their lives. As we travelled to our friends Winy and Cyril’s home I was overcome by what I was surrounded with. Winy and Cyril are better off monetarily but they still live in a 3 room concrete home. They have running water, electricity, TV and a surround sound. No indoor plumbing. But the gospel radiates from them. The way they raise their children, how they close their “restaurant” on Saturday’s and Sundays, so they can have one family day and observe the Sabbath. And their love for each other. I could go on and on about how I found true happiness amongst these wonderful friends.

“As we seek to be happy, we should remember that the only way to real happiness is to live the gospel. We will find peaceful, eternal happiness as we strive to keep the commandments, pray for strength, repent of our sins, participate in wholesome activities, and give meaningful service.” Gospel Topics – www.lds.org

Lesson 2: Marriage

“When a man and woman are married in the temple, their family can be together forever. This is a common goal of Latter-day Saints.

In our Heavenly Father's plan of happiness, a man and a woman can be sealed to one another for time and all eternity. Those who are sealed in the temple have the assurance that their relationship will continue forever if they are true to their covenants. They know that nothing, not even death, can permanently separate them.

Those who are married should consider their union as their most cherished earthly relationship. A spouse is the only person other than the Lord whom we have been commanded to love with all our heart (see D&C 42:22).

Marriage, in its truest sense, is a partnership of equals, with neither person exercising dominion over the other, but with each encouraging, comforting, and helping the other.

Because marriage is such an important relationship in life, it needs and deserves time over less-important commitments. Couples can strengthen their marriage as they take time to talk together and to listen to one another, to be thoughtful and respectful, and to express tender feelings and affection often.

Couples must centre their lives in the gospel of Jesus Christ. As couples help one another keep the covenants they have made, attend church and the temple together, study the scriptures together, and kneel together in prayer, God will guide them. Their companionship will sweeten through the years; their love will strengthen. Their appreciation for one another will grow.”

I have already spoken of Winy and Cyril. They were a wonderful example to me. They arise at 4:30 pm everyday and work side by side in their restaurant until 6:30 or 7:30 pm to provide for their family. They have not been married in the temple, yet, because the cost to go to Manila is so great. But I know without a doubt that next year when the temple is built on Cebu they will be there with their children.

The second individual I would like to mention is Orlando aka Magic. Orlando was one of Landon’s first friends in the Philippines. He had not see him in over 10 years. It did not cross his mind that we would see him while we were there. The last Landon had heard was that he had moved to Bacolod and was not active in the church. As we stood in the park in Valliodolid, Landon saw someone approach him. And then he heard, “Palmer?” There stood Magic, and he is at least a head taller than most Filipinos. He became our guide throughout the day. Taking us to Nanai Edvincula’s home and spending the day with us. The most joyous news we heard that day was that not only was he active in the church but this October, when he fiancé comes back from working in Montreal, he will be getting married to her in the Manila temple. The look of peace that Magic had on his face and the love he had for my husband brought tears to my eyes. When I think of the temple marriage I will always remember the sacrifices my dear friends are willing to make for such a great gift.

Lesson 3: Service

“During His ministry on the earth, Jesus Christ spent His time serving and helping others. True disciples of Jesus Christ do likewise. The Savior said, "By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another" (John 13:35).

The Savior is the best example of service. Even though He came to earth as the Son of God, He humbly served all those around Him. He declared, "I am among you as he that serveth" (Luke 22:27).

Opportunities for service to others are limitless. Kind words and deeds can lift burdens and gladden hearts. Sharing the gospel is a great service with eternal consequences. One true key to happiness is to labour for the happiness of others.” - Gospel Topics, www.lds.org

Every Filipino I met were willing to serve. Some for “tips” but with our friends it was just pure service. They made sacrifices to take us for dinner, and not allow us to pay, and then to make us dinner. Nanai Edvencula was so excited to see us that she did all in her power to make us comfortable and to get dinner for us. She sent Magic out to make us a wonderful type of pork egg roll. (He was a great cook.) And she sent her husband to the next town over to buy chicken for us to eat for dinner. I had to be careful when I was around our friends with what I said because they were more than willing to move heaven and earth to make it possible. Including taking jeepnee rides into Bacolod to spend a couple of hours with us. I was also blown away by the service I received from airline stewardesses, resort staff (namely Sunny), and anyone we met. It was a stark difference to the service that was offered by the same type of people once I landed back in North America.

I will be eternally grateful to my Heavenly Father for the opportunity he gave me to go to the Philippines and learn these lessons. It has been a difficult task remembering these lessons now that I am back home and reality has hit me full force. But I endeavour to change my life to live the gospel more fully, love more fully, and serve with all my heart.